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DadnTX

Adult Male
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DadnTX last won the day on December 1

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About DadnTX

  • Rank
    *** Elite Participant ***
  • Birthday March 23

Parents Only

  • Children
    Two
  • Child 1
    Amber 16
  • Child 2
    Caleb 12
  • Do you spank?
    Yes, Sometimes

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male

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  1. For me, I tend to fall asleep very quickly and easily. My wife has always been amazed by that because it is almost like I just flip a switch and I'm out. Even if I've had coffee, I can usually go right to sleep. The only time I might have an issue initially is if I've got something on my mind that is burning away at me. Then I usually take a bit longer to go to sleep.
  2. Our two kids have chores around the house that we give them in addition to the normal keep your rooms clean rules that most have. Whenever, they need money, we usually will get them what they need. Amber has her own checking / savings and debit card tied to them so that we can just transfer money into the account. She has been very responsible with this over the past few years that she's had it. Before that, we gave her a pre-paid debit card to use and we would just load it when needed.
  3. Amber, on a normal school day without before/after-school activities, will get up around 715a and on the weekends we usually let her sleep until about 10a or maybe 0930a. She's done well to get up on her own without being told. On days when she has to be to school early, then she is up around 0615a. Weekends are a bit hectic right now for her because they have competitions every Saturday and then you have football games on either Thurs/Fri/Sat night each week... It is a bit random like this week it is on Thursday night. Thankfully the band/color guard season is almost over, however football could go on through Christmas week depending upon how far they go in the playoffs. The official football season is over after November 9th. She's ready for a bit of normalcy of sorts where she'll only have an occasional after-school orchestra rehearsal after the band/color guard stuff is done.
  4. We would like to get a pool some day to battle these high temperatures that are in Texas (excess of 100 F). But to answer the question regarding dress, I would probably be a lot more lenient if they were at home versus in a public swimming area. We have a fence around our property, so it does afford some added privacy where you wouldn't have that out at a public location. Overall, my daughter knows to be modest though in her dress and how she is in public compared to at home where she doesn't have to be so worried about things.
  5. I can imagine that she might have a bit of that going on too. I don't think it is driving the homework time up to that extreme necessarily though. But I do get what you're saying though. From a concern perspective, I do get concerned too... However, I also have to look at the big picture of sorts... There's nothing that my wife or I can truly do to "fight the system" alone since it comes from the overall school district. I know we're not alone as parents either, but the district pushes the schools and teachers to do this and we're at the bottom of the food chain. Until there is a change made, we're really in one of those situations where you just have to weather the storm sorta speak. I truly wish we could get some reduction in the way the homework is given out, but there's really not much we can do. It is definitely concerning that the sleep levels are not where they should be... I mean, you have the pediatricians telling parents to make sure your kids get __ hours of sleep, but then the schools sucking every bit of life from your children. Catch 22 of sorts...
  6. Both of y'all present good points. Overall, I think Amber does a great job in managing her homework. She is a straight-A student and stresses when her grades fall below a 95. She's a very competitive soul. Her school seems to be VERY competitive with the GPA rankings where she is currently 9th in her overall graduating class right now. Now, there have been times where she has become stuck on a situation and will "spin her wheels" but then other times where she knows when to reach out for help before it gets out of control. Last night she made an extra point of isolating herself to focus away from the family a bit to study and run through a practice exam for the PSAT that she is taking on this coming Wednesday. So, she has the drive and focus.. I think she does great with that. Overall, 3a is a worst case scenario... I've seen where it could be done a little earlier around say midnight or 1a too. We were shocked two weeks ago when she had near zero homework for Mon-Thurs, but then the teachers all loaded her up on that Friday. Sadly, this was a weekend where she had a competition several hours away and had to be at the school at 03am on Fri night/Sat morning for the bus ride out, and then didn't make it back until after midnight Saturday night. That made for a very long day. Needless to say, her Sunday was gone with all the homework. I agree though, I think the teachers fall out of the big picture of sorts with these types of thoughts/statements. I know they're under pressure to do what they have to with the little time they have. It goes way above their position on the content and what has to be delivered. So, I get that... However, it is quite concerning to see her being "beat up" with the amount of homework consistently. Her mom used to freak out quite a bit over the lack of sleep she was getting and I started seeing that weigh on Amber too. Amber would take her mom's stressing out personally and start to add to her panic. I had to sit down with my wife one on one about that last year after seeing it going on. I let her know I could see the stress and near-breakdown pressure that was piling onto Amber. I tried to head it off again this school year as it doesn't help Amber's situation. I've looked at the homework and it is definitely quite heavy in content and not so much that Amber is losing focus per say or having poor time management. We've always worked hard from early on with her in being sure that she tackles things head-on and doesn't put things off. I wish we could get away with the homework here, like you were stating Whetstone, but the way the teachers are grading things it actually does work against them to not do it. They teach/lecture the entire period and then send them home with the "classwork" as homework. The teachers definitely have it figured out in their favor where they can't afford to miss out on homework.
  7. For my daughter, she does have a normal school night/weekday curfew of 10p. However, if she has loads of homework (which tends to be more times than not), then she might actually be up clear to 03a. She'll get to bed and then have to be back up again for school at around 06a. The teachers here seem to load the kids down with a lot of homework. With her being involved in orchestra and band, it adds to the challenge of being able to get things done because of all the before/after-school practices, etc. Weekends are pretty much gone right now as she has events/competitions on the weekends and the football game performances. When you talk to the teachers, they often say - oh it's only about an hour of homework, but when you add each of those up over 8 periods of courses she had, you can see how it adds up quickly.
  8. Overall, we do not allow Amber to wear makeup beyond maybe lip gloss. That has been a challenge with her color guard/flag team as they do wear makeup, a lot of it!! Uggh.. so the exception has been made there, but nothing outside of that right now. She's been good with that and hasn't put up a fight or desire to wear it so far..
  9. With Amber, we've been ok with them as long as they aren't so tight that it starts to reveal things. Her and her mom bought a light colored pair and we could see panty outlines and colors.. They were also very tight.. I had to do like on the football game and throw a flag on the play there for those. There was another pair that were black, not so tight and I was ok with those. I guess, in a way, it was a bit of a compromise. Her color guard/flag team uniform is a bit much, but we've made things work better with a set of under shorts.. I think they're called spankx? And a nude colored bra up top or I'd be one unhinged dad.. Overall, Amber is good wearing capris currently and loves them. She hasn't pushed for some of the other clothing styles I see with torn/holes in jeans and tight pants to the point that they appear to be painted on. Thankfully.. whew..
  10. It's fun.. I suspect it varies by the different city laws/ordinances.. Some are more strict than others..
  11. I joke with my kids about how I used to ride in the bed of my dad and grandfather's pick-up trucks... It was a blast!
  12. Looking back, I think for my two we had them in booster seats for quite a bit. I believe I finally took Caleb (10) out of his booster seat about a year, maybe a year and a half ago when he reached the size/weight limits. One thing that drives me crazy is letting children sit in the front seat. Those airbags are nothing to laugh at and can be downright deadly for children too. I see little tikes in the front seat while driving around town and I just shake my head. We didn't let our daughter sit upfront until the recommended age of 14. Before that, I would just like to keep them safer in the backseat.
  13. Triple like! All very true!! 100%...
  14. Martha, Thanks for keeping us up to date on things.. It is great to hear that you had some time while on holiday to talk to them both about your feelings and to get their side of things as well. I'm sure when my mom was dating my stepdad that they had these same discussions prior to getting married and while they didn't really talk to me or my siblings after the marriage about it all, things seemed to go ok with us. I was about your age when my parents divorced and then shortly afterward remarried so I can sort of relate to your situation. It was a bit odd having another man in the house, but both of them seemed to do well with handling 3 kids, especially since my stepdad's kids were all grown up by time the marriage happened to my mom. After a little bit of time, we all became a family of sorts and the discipline side of things was just part of the norm for us, I think. We had good times and not so good times as part of growing up like most kids, including the occasional paddling from our stepdad or mom to get us back on track. If your dad is ok with things and sees that your feelings are the same, then with time I'm sure things will be fine. It is important to have a solid relationship with both a "mom" and "dad" for kids when they are growing up and it sounds like your stepmom is a good person from what you have described here. It is good to be able to talk about things and feel comfortable with each other. And, with those times where you've crossed the line or pushed a limit it is important to have solid guidance and consequences just the same to let you know that you need to make corrections on things. Hang in there and know that we're all pulling for you here.. We're an ear to listen and always here to offer advice. I know where you're at from experience and I'm sure you'll do fine whether it is just a grounding or a spanking just the same. It's just a correction when you get of course..
  15. Howdy Martha... I can somewhat understand some of what you're going through there. My parents divorced when I was about 12 years old and both remarried shortly afterward. So, I was about 13 when I had two parents enter into my life. My stepmom had two little girls of her own that my dad ended up adopting and raising as his own as their dad was no longer in the picture. I'm very close to them to this day. My stepdad also had 3 grown children of his own as well. I lived with my mom and stepdad along with my younger brother and sister from the first marriage. I don't really remember how things came about, but my stepdad did take on the fatherly role with us in the house and would spank/paddle or ground us when we were in trouble at times as we grew up. My dad did the same with the two girls that he adopted as well as the other siblings that he had with my stepmom over the years. To be honest, it was just something that probably came along with the blending of the family. This went on until I moved out after high school for each of us. Like many have suggested, it will probably be something that will just come along as you both settle into things, or it could be something that you could talk about when/if you are comfortable. I think what katiesdad has mentioned could also be a good approach to things the next time it comes up. While that may seem scary to think about, it could be an easier way to talk about things further and what you have on your heart/mind there. While my situation wasn't exactly like yours, I did have two step parents to get used to in a very short timeframe right at your age.
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